I really thought after the divorce I would learn how to ride a motorcycle or play the drums.
Turns out I’m just going to
wear the same hat every day...
clear out new paths...
learn to crank any small engine...
and haul a bench into my woods to have coffee and watch the sunset.
Friday night I was face down in my bathroom floor wanting to go back and change so much with anguished tears getting me nowhere.
(mental note to research why angry tears pour out hot.)
I prayed specifically for a distraction.
I knew old ways of shutting people out, silencing my voice, cleaning ocd style, and believing the lies of rejection and unworthiness wouldn’t get me off the bathroom floor as the whole woman that God sees me.
Then comes my Daddy with a push mower distraction. Happily ready to show me how to clean a carburetor and start it up.
“When clogged, air can’t mix with the gas to fuel the cylinders,” he teaches. In spiritual terms, we are so clogged up with wrong beliefs, submitting to feelings, and unforgiveness that the air in our lungs can’t mix with the fuel of the Spirit to truly start up our lives in freedom. #thatwillpreach
I’m done being clogged up! Done with the anxiety that makes me feel like I can’t breathe! Not done with dreams of a motorcycle though.
When life rolls around like a clogged lawnmower that won’t start, could we unclog some things to let it breathe again?
Ah... I see You, God. You’re the Father teaching me, meeting me, in the every day moments. You bring people. You bring healthy distractions. You strengthen. You make new paths!
